Heads Up, Ears Down

This blog accurately identifies depictions of violence and cruelty toward animals in films. The purpose is to provide viewers with a reliable guide so that such depictions do not come as unwelcome surprises. Films will be accurately notated, providing a time cue for each incident along with a concise description of the scene and perhaps relevant context surrounding the incident. In order to serve as a useful reference tool, films having no depictions of violence to animals will be included, with an indication that there are no such scenes. This is confirmation that the films have been watched with the stated purpose in mind.


Note that the word depictions figures prominently in the objective. It is a travesty that discussions about cruelty in film usually are derailed by the largely unrelated assertion that no animals really were hurt (true only in some films, dependent upon many factors), and that all this concern is just over a simulation. Not the point, whether true or false. We do not smugly dismiss depictions of five-year-olds being raped because those scenes are only simulations. No, we are appalled that such images are even staged, and we are appropriately horrified that the notion now has been planted into the minds of the weak and cruel.


Depictions of violence or harm to animals are assessed in keeping with our dominant culture, with physical abuse, harmful neglect, and similar mistreatment serving as a base line. This blog does not address extended issues of animal welfare, and as such does not identify scenes of people eating meat or mules pulling plows. The goal is to itemize images that might cause a disturbance in a compassionate household.


These notes provide a heads-up but do not necessarily discourage watching a film because of depicted cruelty. Consuming a piece of art does not make you a supporter of the ideas presented. Your ethical self is created by your public rhetoric and your private actions, not by your willingness to sit through a filmed act of violence.

The Aristocrats

The Aristocrats. Paul Provenza, 2005.
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Edition screened: Velocity DVD, released 2006. English language. Runtime approximately 90 minutes.

Summary: No particular depictions of violence toward animals. 

The Special Olympics of Film fills the East McKeesport, Pennsylvania, Ramada Inn with proud participants and their sponsors for one very special weekend each year. In addition to the Golden Potato awarded to every entrant champion upon registration, The Aristocrats also earned the 2005 Kevin Smith Prize for Artistic Achievement.

It is difficult to describe the excruciating boredom of watching this film that fails to be remotely funny while claiming to be uproariously hilarious and fails to be offensive while claiming to be off-the-charts vulgar. I recall learning in 7th-grade English class that simply saying something is hilarious (or obscene, or beautiful) over and over does not actually create that desired effect. Nor does the use of endless vulgar words create actual vulgarity. It merely creates the lunchroom conversation that occurs after 7th-grade English class.