Agnès Varda’s Credit Sequences. Alex Vuillaume-Tylski, 2020.
😸
Edition screened: Included in Criterion Blu-ray box set The Complete Films of Agnès Varda (disc 1) released 2020. French language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 8 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
A gentle overview of Varda’s techniques to engage an audience with title and credit sequences that are complimentary thematic compositions.
Bacardi and Coke Bonanza, ’81. William Grefé, 1981.
😿
Edition screened: Included in Arrow Blu-ray box set He Came from the Swamp: The William Grefé Collection, released 2020. English language. Runtime approximately 7 minutes.
Summary: Rodeo animal abuse.
Details: The first 2 minutes of this promotional film are typical rodeo garbage, especially the event where those specific clowns dressed as cowboys try to snap the necks of calves running for their lives. Following that is 45 seconds of idiots clapping and jumping around to Orange Blossom Special. The remaining four minutes are an advertisement for Bacardi Rum, The Mixable One. Turns out that Bacardi is advertised in many leading magazines, just look at ’em all, and Bacardi and Coke has been voted America’s favorite drink.
Big Little Lies: Season 1. Jean-Marc Vallée, 2017.
😿
Edition screened: HBO DVD set, released 2017. English language. Runtime approximately 370 minutes.
Summary: Dead squirrel.
Details: Episode 5, 24:07-24:14, we join the children in staring at a dead squirrel. It is just a dead squirrel with no contrived gore.
Big Little Lies: Season 2. Andrea Arnold, 2019.
😸
Edition screened: HBO DVD set, released 2019. English language. Runtime approximately 338 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
Gordon Klein’s toy room in his waterfront mansion has a 1992 Williams The Getaway: High Speed II and a modified 1980 Stern Galaxy.
A Chat with Nini. Agnès Varda, 2019.
😸
Edition screened: Included in Criterion Blu-ray box set The Complete Films of Agnès Varda (disc 1) released 2020. French language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 1 minute.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
In which Nini sets Agnès Varda straight.
The Clowns (I Clowns). Federico Fellini, 1970.
😸
Edition screened: Raro Blu-ray, released 2011. Italian language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 92 minutes.
Summary: Animal performers are seen in typical circus environments, but there are no depictions of violence or harm to the animals.
The Raro BD also includes Fellini’s 1953 short film Un agenzia matrimoniale and Adriano Aprà’s film essay Fellini’s Circus (2011, 42 minutes, no animal violence).
Daguerréotypes: Photographic Objects. Agnès Varda, 2005.
😸
Edition screened: Included in Criterion Blu-ray box set The Complete Films of Agnès Varda (disc 4) released 2020. French language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 6 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
An introduction to Daguerreotypes, their technology, and history.
Danger Lies in the Words (Maux croisés: Les dossiers secrets de l'inspecteur Lavardin). Claude Chabrol, 1989.
😸
Edition screened: Included in Cohen Blu-ray set The Inspector Lavardin Collection, released 2014. French language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 91 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
The mansion has a spacious game room including a pool table, several arcade games, and four Zaccaria pinball machines that are seen first around 16:25 and again around 1:31:30: a 1979 Hot Wheels, a 1983 Farfalla, a 1980 Fire Mountain, and a 1979 Shooting the Rapids.
The Devil’s Honey (Il miele del diavolo). Lucio Fulci, 1986.
😿
Edition screened: Severin Blu-ray, released 2017. Italian language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 78 minutes.
Summary: Burial of a pet dog. 2/5❤
Details: We don’t know how or why the girl’s German shepherd dies, but we see him lying dead in the grave that she has dug on the beach, 1:09:25. The girl completes the burial by shoveling sand into the hole through 1:10:08.
Dictionary: The Adventure of Words. Brent Maddock, 1963.
😸
Edition screened: Included on Arrow Blu-ray Tremors, released 2020. English language. Runtime approximately 16 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald. David Yates, 2018.
😿
Edition screened: Warner Blu-ray released 2019. English language. Runtime approximately 134 minutes.
Summary: Implied violence to fantastic beasts.
Details: We don’t actually see any beasts killed, but there is a lot of violent flinging of creatures that presumably results in death, such as the giant Chinese kittydragon that grabs smaller beasts by the throat and flings them to the side. The most unkind flinging comes during the opening sequence (the best part of the movie) in which Grindelwald tires of his baby dragon being “so needy” and flings him out of the carriage and into the void.
The FLESH Triple Feature. Michael Findlay (as Julian Marsh) 1967-1968.
😿
Edition screened: Something Weird, released 2003. English language. Cumulative runtime of three features approximately 222 minutes.
Summary: Two of the three films have weird animal-related moments.
The Something Weird compilation includes three slightly fascinating Michael & Roberta Findlay films devoted to lingering close-ups of soft female torsos.
• The Touch of Her Flesh (1967, 75 minutes): A revenge thriller including a particularly admiring sequence of a young Black go-go dancer, and a good unscripted walk-on by somebody’s house cat in the murderer’s apartment. 2.5/5❤
• The Curse of Her Flesh (1968, 78 minutes): The previous story continues, with a minor animal incident at 20:06 when our killer dips the cat’s paw into water that he was shown lacing with something, presumably poison or a sedative. Later, embarrassing bed talk leads the killer to scruff the cat in a vague way while explaining that “all pussies must die,” 23:27-23:30. The girl kicks him out of the apartment and everyone is fine. There is no harm to the cat. The killer just scrunches its fur weirdly, and so his mysterious lacing ingredient must have been something like mouthwash or Fresca. I have no disagreement if you are thinking that this doesn’t make a lot of sense. 2.5/5❤
• The Kiss of Her Flesh (1968, 69 minutes): The saga concludes, but not before a few more languid murders. About six minutes into the film our killer sits down to a meal of lobster - just a whole boiled lobster plopped on a white cafeteria plate garnished only by a bottle of Lancers. His chair is situated so he can stare at an unconscious squishy girl tied to a spindly reproduction neoclassical sideboard. No thing leads to any other, and he is compelled to break the claw off the lobster and use it to pinch her thigh until she comes to, at which point he switches to a pair of awkward salad tongs and tweaks her further. He’s an odd one, our killer. 2.5/5❤
The Frontier Experience. Barbara Loden, 1975.
😸
Edition screened: Included on Criterion Blu-ray #965 Wanda, released 2019. English language. Runtime approximately 25 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
An educational film about 19th-century pioneer life.
Game of Thrones: Seasons 1-8. Various directors, 2011-2019.
😿😿😿
Edition screened: HBO Blu-ray box set, released 2019. Mostly english language, with exotic fictional languages and English subtitles. Runtime of all episodes approximately 71 hours and 10 minutes.
Summary: Pervasive killing and mutilating of animals.
I watched the entire series for the first time in October 2020. I found it exciting and enjoyable for the most part, occasionally hobbled by badly written dialogue.
There is no point in enumerating the endless depictions of animal cruelty, as there are few episodes lacking at least one or two close-up of a dead, dying, or mutilated animal. Horses suffer badly, brutally lost in battle or slain by their owners in rage. A family of wolf cubs we meet early in Season One mostly is violently killed one-by-one throughout the series. Village scenes open with close-ups of dead game animals at market or lugged about, and one episode begins at an army encampment with strategic conversation over the seemingly interminable skinning of a large animal. Magical beasts are killed and a marauding horde makes an enormous environmental sculpture from the hacked-up bodies of horses.
There is no way to pick your way through Game of Thrones avoiding or agonizing over depictions of animal cruelty. Watch the series or don’t watch it.
Girlfriends. Claudia Weill, 1978.
😸
Edition screened: Criterion Blu-ray #1055, released 2020. English language. Runtime approximately 88 minutes.
Summary: No animals or references to animals in the film.
Come for the very good social realism of this easy-to-watch drama, stay for the generous exterior footage of SoHo in the 70s and one of the most authentic depictions of New York life I recall seeing.
Bonus material on the Criterion BD includes a good discussion with director Weill and actors Melanie Mayron, Christopher Guest, and Bob Balaban, and two short films, both free of animal violence:
• Joyce at 34 (1972, Joyce Chopra and Claudia Weill) a 28-minute documentary about the impact of pregnancy on Chopra’s career.
• Commuters (1970, Eliot Noyes and Claudia Weill) a beautiful 4-minute section from the omnibus project Big Town.
Grave Robbers (Ladrones de tumbas). Rubén Galindo Jr., 1989.
😸
Edition screened: Vinegar Syndrome Blu-ray #331, released 2020. Spanish language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 88 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
Groundhog Day. Harold Ramis, 1993.
😸
Edition screened: Columbia TriStar Blu-ray, released 2009. English language. Runtime approximately 101 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
Rent-A-Girl. William Rose, 1965.
😸
Edition screened: Included on Something Weird DVD Total Fulfillment Triple Feature, released 2011. Muddy English language. Runtime approximately 77 minutes.
Summary: No animals or references to animals in the film. 2/5❤
The Total Fulfillment Triple Feature also includes Aroused (1966) and Help Wanted Female (1968).
Sensing Bodies. Trois Couleurs, 2019.
😸
Edition screened: Included in Criterion Blu-ray box set The Complete Films of Agnès Varda (disc 1) released 2020. Scored, no dialogue track. Runtime approximately 2 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
A brief montage of Varda’s techniques for emphasizing human form.
The So-Called Caryatids (Les dites cariatides). Agnès Varda, 1984.
😸
Edition screened: Included in Criterion Blu-ray box set The Complete Films of Agnès Varda (disc 3) released 2020. French language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 12 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
A narrated review of some architectural caryatids in Paris.
Disc 3 also includes a short follow-up of some addition caryatid figures, Les dites cariatides bis (2005).
You’ve Got Beautiful Stairs, You Know (T’as de beaux escaliers, tu sais...). Agnès Varda, 1986.
😸
Edition screened: Included in Criterion Blu-ray box set The Complete Films of Agnès Varda (disc 3) released 2020. French language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 4 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
Ô saisons ô chateaux. Agnès Varda, 1958.
😸
Edition screened: Included in Criterion Blu-ray box set The Complete Films of Agnès Varda (disc 2) released 2020. French language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 21 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
A sumptuous tour of exteriors and grounds of les châteaux de la Loire.
Harold and Maude. Hal Ashby, 1971.
😸
Edition screened: Criterion Blu-ray #608, released 2012. English language. Runtime approximately 91 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
Various late 60s pinball machines in the arcade around 1:17:00, mostly side views.
He Came from the Swamp: The William Grefé Collection. William Grefé, 1966-1981.
😿😿
Edition screened: Arrow Blu-ray box set, released 2020. English language. Cumulative runtime of seven feature films and significant alternate versions approximately 841 minutes.
Summary: Death Curse of Tartu, Mako, and the Bacardi promotional film include violence to animals, click through links below.
Ironically presented in Arrow’s grand style, this set includes seven feature films:
Sting of Death (1966)
Death Curse of Tartu (1966)
The Hooked Generation (1968)
The Psychedelic Priest (1971)
The Naked Zoo (1970)
Mako: The Jaws of Death (1976)
Whiskey Mountain (1977)
Bonuses include about five new featurettes focusing on topics such as the awkward amateur dancing sequences that everyone involved with this project insists on calling ‘go-go dancing’, Grefé’s special effects, and Crown International Pictures. We get alternate versions of two films: a Super-8 cut of Mako and the “Barry Mahon” version of The Naked Zoo (more on that through the link).
Also included is the two-hour 2016 documentary They Came from the Swamp: The Films of William Grefé and a 7-minute promotional video disguised as a trip to a rodeo, Bacardi and Coke Bonanza (1981).
Heaven’s Gate. Michael Cimino, 1980.
😿😿
Edition screened: Criterion Blu-ray #636, released 2012. English language. Runtime approximately 216 minutes.
Summary: cockfighting; horses in gun fights
Details:
1) A backyard butchering scene starts at 21:57 and highlights the chore of getting the mountain of discarded guts into the mountainous discarded gut cauldron. Other action with the hanging carcass in the background through 24:00.
2) A man is ready to shoot a calf in the head but is interrupted and nothing comes of this; just before the cockfighting scene below.
3) Cockfighting scene starts at 58:15 and is intercut with other action until the fight is interrupted at 1:04:07 by people squabbling. We see the white rooster injured and his owner reviving him to make him continue.
4) While unloading horses from a box car, a white horse slips and falls due to missing battens on the ramp, 2:07:09. This disregard for the animals’ safety is easily corrected both in the film and in the real world, and I am left wandering about the reality of this “accident”. The ramp is not a 19th-century artifact but part of the set built for the movie, suggesting that some battens were intentionally left off and the camera ready for the impending fall.
5) A rather spectacular battle scene unfortunately includes a horse rearing up as he is shot at 3:02:00. The battle scene concludes at 3:07:00 with a few milder implications of injured horses, the sort of depictions common in Western movies that are unclear whether the horse or the rider has been shot.
Holmes & Watson. Etan Cohen, 2018.
😿
Edition screened: Sony Blu-ray, released 2019. English language. Runtime approximately 90 minutes.
Summary: Violence to a pet turtle.
Details: Early in the film, at about 2:40, young Sherlock’s large pet turtle is snatched away and hurled over or onto a roof. We just see the aggressive child’s action briefly, not the consequences. Next scene shows Young Sherlock sitting on a bench with the turtle in an elaborate wheeled bed/sling contraption.
Holmes & Watson could have been funny but was simply awful. A rather long compilation of outtakes started automatically after the credits, just Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly snowballing funny lines that were far more entertaining that the scripted comedy.
The Hooked Generation. William Grefé, 1968.
😸
Edition screened: Included in Arrow Blu-ray box set He Came from the Swamp: The William Grefé Collection, released 2020. English language. Runtime approximately 95 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
The Inspector Lavardin Collection. Claude Chabrol, 1985-1989.
😸
Edition screened: Cohen Media Blu-ray, released 2014. French language with English subtitles. Cumulative runtime approximately 389 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
The Cohen 2-BD set includes the two feature mystery films Chicken with Vinegar (1985) and Inspector Lavardin (1986), along with two made-for-TV-movies, The Black Snail (1988) and Danger Lies in the Words (1989). Click on individual titles for details.
Interview. Steve Buscemi, 2007.
😸
Edition screened: Sony DVD, released 2007. English language. Runtime approximately 83 minutes.
Summary: No animals or references to animals in the film.
A very good conversation drama with a captivating performance by Sienna Miller.
Island of Blood (Whodunit?). William T. Naud, 1982.
😸
Edition screened: Vinegar Syndrome Blu-ray #334, released 2020. English language. Runtime approximately 83 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
The most interesting thing about Whogivesa? is the dynamic contrast between two insipidly unlikeable pieces of music that repeat throughout the movie. Most often we see a tape recorder playing a garbage song in a trite commercial style that people unfortunately have become conditioned to call ‘punk’. Interspersed, however, are plaintiff interludes by a David Gates impersonator who gazes wistfully out a window with his knock-off Gibson Dove and croons “There’s a hole in the sky”. One’s cringing inner wager as to which of these atrocities one next must hear again is the most compelling reason to keep watching.
It. Andy Muschietti, 2017.
😿😿
Edition screened: Warner Blu-ray, released 2018. English language. Runtime approximately 135 minutes.
Summary: Murder of a sheep.
Details:
1) A sheep is executed with a bolt gun, 10:10-10:24. Although a quick image, we see the impact on the animal’s head with blood.
2) Another sheep is killed, this time screened from our view, 1:30:14-1:30:17.
3) A criminal teenager is about to shoot a nice cat that is held in distress by the thug’s toady, but there is last-minute intervention 1:30:42-1:30:58.
I did not realize directors still followed this 1980s Spielberg formula in which a group of twelve-year-olds convenes every ten minutes to stand in a circle and shout vulgar over-written dialogue.
Led Zeppelin. Jimmy Page, 2003.
😸
Edition screened: Rhino DVD set, released 2003. English language. Runtime approximately 320 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
Library Report. Ron Underwood, 1984.
😸
Edition screened: Included on Arrow Blu-ray Tremors, released 2020. English language. Runtime approximately 25 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
A dog is ‘walked’ in a rather inconsiderate way, but certainly not hurt, by a badly-dressed Dalek at the opening of this surprisingly watchable film that captures 1984’s prediction of c. 2020 junior high school life. Many small things are amusingly close misses, but of course the big glitch is the failure to predict the internet. In this film our young Trump-era scholar is taught to write a “Library Report” by taking notes on 3x5 cards and then organizing those thoughts on a word processor the size of a Hammond organ.
Lost Highway. David Lynch, 1997.
😸
Edition screened: Kino Lorber Blu-ray, released 2019. English language. Runtime approximately 135 minutes.
Summary: No animals or references to animals in the film.
Once Upon a Time in . . . Hollywood. Quentin Tarantino, 2019.
😿
Edition screened: Columbia Blu-ray, released 2019 English language. Runtime approximately 161 minutes.
Summary: Combat with a dog.
Details: Home invaders are attacked by a dog, with depictions of the dog being punched 2:25:40-2:26:20. After the invaders are quelled we see the good doggie go check on other family members.
Planes, Trains, and Automobiles. John Hughes, 1987.
😸
Edition screened: Paramount DVD, released 2000. English language. Runtime approximately 93 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
The Polar Express. Robert Zemeckis, 2004.
😸
Edition screened: Warner DVD, released 2005. English language. Runtime approximately 99 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
Raw. Julia Ducournau, 2016.
😿😿😿
Edition screened: Universal DVD, released 2017. French language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 99 minutes.
Summary: Recurring scenes of animal dissection and similar in the context of veterinary training.
Details:
1) Quick flashes of fetal animal specimens in jars of formaldehyde, 13:09-13:20.
2) A horse in tethering restraints is forced to run on a treadmill, 24:25-25:03.
3) A cow in a stanchion hooked up with electrode monitors, 28:38-28:48.
4) A scene in a dissection class includes images of cut-up cows and horses and an explicit scene of a dog being cut open, 54:23-55:30.
5) Dog with rigor mortis on a lab table, 58:05-58:17.
Recorded Live. S.S. Wilson, 1975.
😸
Edition screened: Included on Arrow Blu-ray Tremors, released 2020. English language. Runtime approximately 8 minutes.
Summary: No depictions of violence or harm to animals.
Rest in Pieces. José Ramón Larraz, 1987.
😿
Edition screened: Vinegar Syndrome Blu-ray #336, released 2020. English language. Runtime approximately 90 minutes.
Summary: Depiction of a dog being struck.
Details: A bottle of scotch is smashed on the head of an attacking dog at 1:02:42. The dog runs off apparently uninjured.
Tremors. Ron Underwood, 1990.
😿😿
Edition screened: Arrow Blu-ray, released 2020. English language. Runtime approximately 96 minutes.
Summary: Animals attacked by sand worms.
Details:
1) Ariel view of a pen full of dead bloody sheep, 16:32-16:43; no closeups or details.
2) A horse is attacked and killed by sand worms, 32:26-32:48; somewhat graphic.
The Arrow release also includes three early short films by Tremors crew:
Dictionary: The Adventure of Words (1963 Brent Maddock)
Recorded Live (1975 S.S. Wilson)
Library Report (1984 Ron Underwood)
Varda by Agnès (Varda par Agnès). Agnès Varda and Didier Rouget, 2019.
😿
Edition screened: Included in Criterion Blu-ray box set The Complete Films of Agnès Varda (disc 1) released 2020. French language with English subtitles. Runtime approximately 119 minutes.
Summary: Two clips from early films.
Details:
1) From Cléo from 5 to 7: A street entertainer swallows live frogs, 14:12-14:32.
2) From La Pointe-Courte: Fish are netted then seen flapping in a box, 54:28-54:44.
This first component in Criterion’s massive box set is an enjoyable and illuminating retrospective of Varda’s work, hosted by the director herself. Do not dismiss this as just another ho-hum overview. Varda’s warmth, intelligence, and humanity are revealed as gifts to the world.
Wanda. Barbara Loden, 1970.
😸
Edition screened: Criterion Blu-ray #965, released 2019. English language. Runtime approximately 103 minutes.
Summary: No particular depictions of violence or harm to animals.
Bonus material included with this good film includes Loden’s 1975 educational film The Frontier Experience, Katja Raganelli’s 1970 documentary I Am Wanda, and an appearance by Loden on The Dick Cavett Show.